You know what you’re getting into with Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. You’re not expecting to see a good film… and you’re definitely not expecting to see a historically accurate film. So what are you expecting? Something over the top and absurd? Of course, and on that level this film delivers.
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter begins with a young Abe Lincoln who has his first encounter with a vampire at early age. Lincoln’s father is indebted to Rufus (a powerful vampire), and since he can’t pay, Rufus collects in another way. He bites Lincoln’s mother Nancy – causing her death (In case you were wondering – Nancy Lincoln passed away from “milk sickness” – which was a common ailment at that time caused by milk or beef from a contaminated cow). With a hatred instilled in him and the need for vengeance, Abe (Benjamin Walker) goes after Rufus as soon as he is a little bit older and has the means. In the process, he meets an ally – Henry Sturges (Dominic Cooper). Henry plays an integral part in training Abe in a much more visually entertaining manner of slaughtering vampires than we ever saw Giles teach Buffy.
From there Abe goes on to become a lean, mean killing machine. From his courtship of Mary Todd Lincoln to the comically inaccurate history, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is a movie that you can’t help but wonder – how did this get made?
There is no problem with the acting. In fact, the actors do all they can do in such laughable roles. They take scenes seriously that the audience can’t help but giggle at. The script is mostly fine as well, though the dialogue could be a bit more fleshed out in certain scenes. However, the overall plot is just so ludicrous that you can’t help but laugh through the entire film. From unexpected historical figures showing up where you least expect them, to the notion that the South fought the Civil War with vampires, to some of the most memorably extravagant Matrix style fight scenes you’ve ever seen – Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter isn’t a film that takes itself seriously in the least.
It’s so bad, that it’s actually entertaining. And while many critics will continue to give the film poor reviews, I can’t help but look at them and raise an eyebrow… Did this film not turn out exactly how it was intended? It’s not supposed to be a epic war movie or a period piece for Oscar consideration. It’s just supposed to be a movie that blows your mind at the fact that it was actually made into a movie. Yes, it’s a horrible movie, but it’s a horrible movie that will make your stomach hurt from laughing.
Days after seeing it, I’m still not entirely sure what to make out of it… That’s up to you.
Review By: Emma Loggins