The time we dread yearly is upon us…the Game of Thrones season finale aired last night and, although awesomely emotional and engaging, we the fans will be left with the unfortunate task of trying to preoccupy ourselves until season 5 premieres in 2015. While we wait, however, let us reminisce on the good times and let the events that occurred (oh, and there were many) simmer in our brains.
When we opened, Jon Snow was trudging defiantly to the Free Folk camp to meet with their leader, Mance Rayder, and trying to negotiate a truce with the men of the Night’s Watch. Before they got to the ugly point of the meeting, Mance and Jon shared a drink in honor of Ygritte. Mance told Jon that he believed Ygritte really loved him because all she could do is talk about how she wanted to kill him and that’s how love works in this world. After the niceties, Mance told Jon that his camp would surrender on a few conditions: the Free Folk wanted the protection of The Wall, so the Night’s Watch would need to allow them to enter the gates with guards down, and promised that if that happened no one would be killed. Before a conclusion could be reached to that end, MOTHERLOVING STANNIS BARATHEON and his troops slaughtered the Free Folk from both sides of the forest and met Mance and Jon in the middle! Definitely wasn’t expecting that!
After introducing himself as Ned Stark’s son (Baratheons and Starks are tight, remember) Stannis asked Jon his opinion of what should be done with Mance, to which Jon advised he be kept as prisoner for questioning. Jon also advised Stannis to burn all the dead bodies before nightfall, but didn’t go into details about why.
Back in King’s Landing (or as I lovingly call it, The Land of Eternal Misery) Cersei was overseeing The Mountain being patched up after Oberyn-bliteration and is informed that The Viper got one last strike in before dying…The Mountain is poisoned and dying. Cersei gives the go ahead on a sketchy looking last-ditch operation that could “change” him, but not weaken him, which is all Cersei gives a damn about.
Cersei takes her dark cloud over to Tywin and rages about how she won’t be marrying Loras or moving to Highgaarden or leaving her last child, Tommen, to the likes of Tywin and Margaery. Cersei then pulls out the biggest stop she’s got… she confirms to her father that the rumors are true, and she’s been sleeping with her brother and that the Baratheon heirs are Lannister heirs. Tywin says he doesn’t believe it, and Cersei tells him he does and saunters out to find Jamie.
The twins have a talk about how Jamie can’t believe Cersei would really let Tyrion die, and Cersei lets him know that she’s never considered Tyron family. Then Cersei proceeds to seduce Jamie, and they have gross sibling sex in the middle of a room – Cersei doesn’t care if anyone could walk in at any moment.
In Mereen, Dany is taking care of her queenly duties and listening to the plights of her people one by one. This week’s cases include and old slave man and a grieving father. The old man pleaded with Dany to allow him to sell himself back into slavery, as the shelters are harsh for the elderly and he needs his purpose in life restored. Dany grants his request, saying that he can sign a year long contract with his old master. The grieving father brought the bones of his 3-year-old to Dany and cried to her about a dragon (the missing Drogon) burning her and killing her. A distraught Dany headed down to the catacombs to go against her name and put chains on her other two “children” in order to keep them from doing further harm.
Bran returns and we see that the clan have made their way to the Weirwood tree. Jojen still looks like he’s dying and the tree is within sight, but as they make their way toward it and a Wight hand bursts through the snow, grabbing Jojen’s ankle and pulling him down. More Wights literally pop up from beneath the snow and the clan (Hodor, Bran, Jojen and Meera) must fight for their lives. Bran wargs into Hodor so that he can help with the battle, leaving his body unattended. Bran’s mind matched with Hodor’s strength is a force to be reckoned with, but unfortunately Jojen is stabbed in the midst of the struggle. As he’s dying and Bran’s body is about to be attacked, a female creature saves the clan with by throwing exploding balls of fire. She tells Bran, Meera and Hodor to follow her and Jojen gave his blessing, knowing his time has come. Meera finishes him off and they follow the creature into a cave.
Once safe, as the cave was enchanted and the Wights can’t enter, they learned that the girl creature is part of a race called The Children, thought to be extinct and older than the First Men. She led them to the Three-Eyed Raven, but in human form, who ensured Bran that Jojen knew exactly what his fate was from the moment they decided to come. He also told Bran that he’ll never walk again, but that he will fly.
We also checked back in on Pod and Brienne, still making their way across the land looking for Sansa, when they run into Arya and The Hound. Arya and Brienne seemed to connect at first, both being tomboys who prefer swords to dresses, but the bonding ends once The Hound called Brienne out for her sword made of “Lannister gold.” As Brienne tried to explain, The Hound wasn’t trying to hear any of it, and the two soon ended up in a brutal battle over Arya. Brienne was victorious in the end, but Arya didn’t trust her by then and hid until she could safely go check on The Hound, who was mortally wounded.The Hound begged for Arya to finish him off, even stooping so low as to talk dirty and try provoke Arya to do it, but in the end she simply took his gold, and walked away, leaving him begging for death. A strangely satisfying end to one dynamic duo.
In King’s Landing, Jamie decides to save his little brother from Cersei’s clutches once again and frees him from his cell, telling him that everything he needs to make his escape is already taken care of. The brothers say their goodbyes and Tyrion makes his escape, but not before stumbling on Shae in his father’s bed. The mixture of hatred and love at the sight of her overcomes him and Tyrion strangles Shae right there and leaves her.
Tyrion finds his beloved father next… on the toilet. The two exchange words about Tyrion’s love for Shae and Tywin’s lack of love for Tyrion, and by the second time Tywn utters the word “whore” he has an arrow in his heart… then another. Did ANYONE see big bad Tywin Lannister bring murdered by his son on the toilet coming?! I know I didn’t! Can’t wait to see what that HBO Beautiful Death poster looks like!
Our closing shot to marinate on? Arya sailing off into the sunset toward Braavos, thanks to her shiny silver coin and one simple phrase: Valar Morghulis.
Game of Thrones Finale Death Count
-Jojen Reed: Dead
-The Hound: Probably dead
-Tywin Lannister: Dead
Well fans that’s all for this season! Let us know what you thought of the finale and give us ideas on how to occupy our time during the break in the comments below!
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